[x]

Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
Maybe.
But at least it makes me
Me.

FrostbiteNumbness
I can’t feel my toes and at first I think
It’s just my toes.
I can cover them up.
I can warm them.

It spreads, like fire,
Like ice.
I glance away for a second, it seems, and my feet are cold
Pat –pat
That’s funny, I didn’t feel that
Maybe I’ll cover them up too
I’ll warm them up.

I’ll take a nap
Maybe a short rest will make it all better, warm them
Up…
What’s that? How long has it been?
My legs… are you still mine..
Why has my breath left me, short?
Has everything but deserted me?

What about you, are you still here?
Are you still with me?
Hello?
And before I can say goodbye, I think my thoughts are leaving me too –

Sleeping Beautyshe’s in love with a character who
never existed but in the labyrinth of her head:
a patchwork composition of beautiful, lengthy words
she’d heard in her catatonic state; coma living
day in and day out, reliant on the salvation
of a man made of foreign wishing
and imperfection and necessity – an ignorance
of the less than ideal perception of self she’d
come to fear, absention stained romantic to the point
where daydreams were a standard for survival

(real living is for the purposeful of heart,
he loves her in her sleep)

UneditedWe cry.
We scream.
We fight for our dream.

We scream.
We cry.
We're just waiting to die.

The same emotions
with a different drive.
Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.

The same in one way,
different in another
brother and sister, sister and brother.

So close in feeling,
so different in the end.
Falling apart, or finally on the mend?

Which am I?
Will I ever know?
Fighting to stay or ready to go?

Maybe I'm both,
in some impossible way.
Emotions oddly mixed everyday.

Wouldn't surprise.
I'm such a freak.
Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"

Happily AloneHonesty,
She does not have,
Personalities,
She has many of them.

A million shields,
a million personalities,
She's always changing,
to fit every person around her.

If one were to ask why,
she would answer with,
I will never reveal my weaknesses,
because she's evil.

She hates everyone,
stupider than her is barely tolerable,
smarter than her is too scary,
She hates it all.

She leaves the world behind,
To one she has dreamt of,
No color,
nobody else.

Then,
she will smile,
why,
because she is truly happy alone.

She is not evil,
She does not hate you,
She is not dishonest,
She simply wants to be alone.

lifelinesI fear the sound of sparrows
and the density of leaves
against dew-muffled blades
of grass,

and I'm drowning
in the sky.

My skin has learned how
to peel itself off
without causing a commotion
in my marrows or
even show the slightest hint
of pain,
and my heart has learned how
to hush the stars in their wake
and keep it all a secret.

There's a sea in my mouth
and I can't swim.

There are lifelines
cast like these and it will
all end with the same tragedy.

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

of seafoam thronesFrom Atlas’ hands she wept to me,
atop Africas and South Atlantics;

this is one situation unaffected by
ember eyes and windy lashes
(it has no anatomy).

You are sparrows stranded
in tiny crevices and cliffside love,
though you rebuke flight
in the fear of chipping feathers.

So what do you do?

You reach for my soul,
coveting flight with shaking
dainty arms…

and perhaps I’ll let you:
With flytrap lips and
glass shaped hips…
you are unfit for anything but
sight.

(But beauty isn’t everything)

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

weight of the worldand suddenly--
it was like the world decided that
it didn't want to carry its burden any longer,
so it shifted the weight
into the hollows of my bones
and told me that
it was my problem now.

Ashes on the SandWe put you in
a crystal box
small enough for me
to hold in my
hands
(and that thought gives me
chill bumps)
The tide was high
where we took you
and I remember thinking
how pointless it was
(you were just going to wash
up on the shore)
Everyone was quiet
and some people cried
and as you were tossed
out to sea like so
many grains of sand
I thought how much
I missed you
(Now I think how much
I hate you
for leaving)

PerfectEver had the feeling where you can't stop looking at a picture?
Your gorgeous face makes me smile
Go weak at the knees
Makes me giggle like a little girl

Those morning texts
All day conversations
Random silly things like that
Make me smile

I see the led light flash the colours I've set for when I get a message from you
My heart flutters
My cheeks flush
I go deaf to the world when I'm reading a message from you

If your down
I'm always there for you
I know you don't want to worry me
I know you want me to smile
But I'm always here for you
No matter how you feel
I'd prefer to help
Than for you to be down

Your gorgeous eyes
Are mesmerising
You

A Charmed LifeDoll-faced men and sinkholes, ancient tombstones
Leaves piled ankle-deep, falling down
Old wells, old graves, old friends lost
Pirate adventures in Neverland
Don't go into that barn

Ponchoboy and Rangergirl rise from the ashes
From the cold river, from afar
Remember before they were born, how they
Held hands and jumped into the world
Don't go into that school

Ladybugs, pennies, notes from the dead sun eclipse
Scrape the inside of your skull for clues
All the old dreams are still there, petrified
You are a rock of ages gibbering
Don't go into that factory

Why don't you kill yourself?“Why don’t you kill yourself?”
Is the voice that often pops in my head
To remind me I’d be better off dead.
As I sit in my two story house
I’m always alone and filled with doubt.
I take medications I don’t know why
These thoughts constantly go through my mind.
I remind myself I have friends who care
And my parents, well, try to be there.
Some would think I’m being over dramatic
Others will think these thoughts could only come from an addict
Or a psycho.
As I weigh the pros and cons
The commercials shut off, the main program goes on
So I turn my mind off and let the show play
And hope that I can be happy one day.

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

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MasqueradeIn this place, we like to hide;
Push our failings to the side.
With a mask we hide our face,
Restricting us to a tiny space.
[Chorus]
Welcome to the masquerade of life;
Nothing is wrong, nothing is right.
Prisoners of our own disguise,
To lose the mask reveals our lies.

No one knows who they are:
This Charade has gone too far.
A speak of truth, within this crowd,
A breaking mask is much too loud.
[Chorus]
Don't be fooled by this spell
Many have been and they fell.
[Chorus]
This masquerade has doomed us all.

Away From YouTravelling down this endless road,
Moving further away from home,
Street signs are flying by;
Wish you we at my side.
Street lights shine on the way,
Brings me back to the day
When we were young, without fear
With no care, you were here.
[Chorus]:
Be safe when I get back,

I pray to you God;
She is the only thing I lack

When I'm away from home.
Every call and every text
Remind me of the times I missed;
Chances to be with you,
Even with nothing to do.
As I go, you're on my mind,
Looking back when I have time.
When we finally turn around,
Thoughts of you become sound.
[Chorus]
I know we are where we're supposed to be,
But it hurts just the same.
Every prayer and line are for you.

Two FacedOn the right you seem
Perfect and clean;
But your left is cold,
Full of scars that grow old.
[Chorus]:
You're a two faced liar
You make me wanna scream
If you get any higher
You'll wish it was a dream

You can't hold this facade
One mistake and you will fall
Good try on this endeavour
But you have just lost it all
[Chorus]
Beware the truth you hide
All you cover up with a lie
Just wait your fall can't be too far,
It will hurt just like the bitch you are.

I Feel It TooWhite squares covered in red,
Seeing this fills me with dread,
I can't comprehend the pain we feel,
But sometimes I wish it weren't real.
As I look in from the door
At the shape across the floor
Tears start to fill my eyes
And it rids my head of empty lies.
I wonder where did I go wrong,
Even if I didn't know them long,
Knowing a friend feels this pain
Kills me inside, drives me insane.
If sometimes you feel you're alone,
Or even just your has grown;
Don't forget that is not true,
There's always someone here for you.
The pain of my friends hurts me most,
Making me feel like I'm a ghost.
You might not see me, but I am there,
And always know that I do care.

It's In The Little ThingsWe know what we want,
But do we know what we need?
Searching for an obvious display,
Yet missing its very seed.
Sometimes we're annoyed
By the slightest wrong,
Yet to forget about it
Takes ten times as long.
Take some time and step back
And look at the details of life;
Life is full of little things
That make everything alright.
Even a compliment missed,
A smile as you walk by,
Even just to have life
Can change you inside.
Don't get caught up
In the maze of our lives;
Appreciate the little things
And enjoy feeling alive.

Lost AloneLiving in this world alone,
Trying hard to find my home
All I ever feel is lost,
For someone else I've paid the cost.
I look around and everyone's there,
But I feel as if nobody cares
They see a side that I choose to show,
No one tries to look deep below.
Nobody knows who I am
I doubt that anyone can
Even when I'm in the light
My thoughts walk through the night
Is there a way out of this hole?
A way to gain more control?
If there is, someone show me
Or forever stuck I will be.

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Submitted: March 11, 2012
Submitted with: Sta.sh Writer

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Need to Belong

by ~shraka-12, Mar 11, 2012, 5:51:07 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

If I asked you: "Who am I?"

I would like to see you try

To answer the best you can,

but I'm ignored once again.

This road was dark from the start;

It won't stop tripping my heart.

I'm alone, it's just not fair,

All these 'friends' don't seem to care.

The ones who do, I don't see:

For they're far away from me.

Where I am becomes my cage,

And everyone fuels my rage

No one really wants to know

What's killing me down below.

Even if I see no gain,

Only one can see my pain;

To him I tell every sin

And hope this cure will begin.

I know there is nothing wrong,

I just don't think I belong.

There are things I keep inside

Things the mask I wear can hide.

But someday it will come out,

Showing me what I'm about.

Need to Belongby ~shraka-12

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

another depression one, but with a slight religious twist

~TheFrozenCross Mar 12, 2012 Student Traditional Artist

"All these 'friends' don't seem to care.
The ones who do, I don't see:
For they're far away from me."

you know that works well for me *smirks coldly*

~shraka-12 Mar 12, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

yup, that is exactly what it's like :/

~TheFrozenCross Mar 12, 2012 Student Traditional Artist

haha u should write one on us XD

~shraka-12 Mar 12, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

i just might when i get to writing again

~TheFrozenCross Mar 12, 2012 Student Traditional Artist

haha have fun XD

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~screamsinscilence Mar 11, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

This is really great, nice job.

~shraka-12 Mar 12, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

thanks

~SaphiqueX13 Mar 11, 2012 Student General Artist

I used to feel this way a lot, it's very well worded

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